Can anyone tell me how many times the irs can keep putting me off for 30 days at a time?

They can continue to extend the processing time indefinitely ...

If the return has been processing for more than 21 days then you can call the IRS …

Call the IRS:  1-800-829-1040  hours 7 AM - 7 PM local time Monday-Friday

When calling the IRS do NOT choose the first option re: "Refund", or it will send you to an automated phone line.  

So after first choosing your language, then do NOT choose Option 1 (refund info).  Choose option 2 for "personal income tax" instead.

Then press 1 for "form, tax history, or payment".   

Then press 3 "for all other questions."

Then press 2 "for all other questions."  It should then transfer you to an agent.

Or you can contact your local IRS office.  See this IRS website for local IRS offices - http://www.irs.gov/uac/Contact-Your-Local-IRS-Office-1

If it's been more than 90 days since the return was accepted  then you can ask for help from the Tax Payer Advocate office:

At the following IRS website, find the USA map and click on your state, and it will give you the number of your IRS Taxpayer Advocate.

http://www.irs.gov/uac/Contact-a-Local-Taxpayer-Advocate

If you are unsuccessful with the Taxpayer Advocate for your area, you can also try the special IRS phone number for the Taxpayer Advocate Service at 877-777-4778.

More info on the Taxpayer Advocate Service:
http://www.taxpayeradvocate.irs.gov/about/who-we-are

http://www.irs.gov/Advocate/Taxpayer-Advocate-Service-6

Also see this article for more info on how the Taxpayer Advocate Service works:
http://www.irs.gov/taxtopics/tc104.html