For 2023, If I filed "married filed jointly", is my social security cap 160,200? If we both worked at separate jobs and we paid more than 9,932.40, can we get a refund?

The excess SS "cap" is a per person amount---not an amount for the couple.    When you enter your incomes, you need to make very sure that you enter each W-2 under the specific spouse's name in the software.  The income screens will have spots with each of your names.   If you make a mistake and enter all of the income (and  thus all of the SS) under only one spouse's name, it could look like excess SS was withheld resulting in a refund.  When the IRS catches the mistake a year or two later, you would get a nasty letter demanding repayment of the inflated refund with interest.